Conquering Fear

A lot has happened in the past year. I quit my job, I stopped going to school, I chose to get lost. Its funny how I actually felt more “found”, or free stumbling and just taking time to enjoy life, than I ever did in a structured environment such as work and school.

DJ’ing lately is going well. I am now a resident at the bar I have been working at as an opener. Its funny how I went from being a bouncer at a bar, to years later becoming a DJ there. I’ll never forget how before I worked there at all, how me and one of my friends would talk about Dj’ing there. This was a few years ago.

Me and my one friend would talk about how we would be good DJ’s at the bar. We talked about how awesome it would be and how fun it would be! At the time we were just dabbling with it all. We both coincidently, invested in DJ controllers because we wanted to get closer to electronic music. We were both inspired by the nightlife of Cleveland and the DJ’s who play a huge part in the city’s culture and energy.

Fasforward to now, and I am a DJ at that bar. Although my buddy isn’t a DJ, at least one of us stayed the course. My friend dabbled in it before and worked for a company that did different events downtown on one of the major boats. He eventually got out of it because it wasn’t suiting the “electronic” or “EDM” needs that we both desired. My buddy seems happy with his life and career that he has always had as an engineer. Once in awhile I do see him, or he will invite me to go to a show, or we will get together with our other friends. However, it isn’t often.

The other night I was amongst other DJ’s in Cleveland at a networking event. I can’t tell you how good it felt! This was my second networking event and it just felt right. I’m getting to know the other DJ’s better and it’s crazy how the people I looked up to, I am now able to actually spend some quality time with during these events! It feels like being around a favorite celebrity, or a favorite professional athlete. These people are working hard and they have progressed in an industry that is very challenging. A lot of them have been in the game since they were very young and it shows. What I love the most is how humble and kind all of them are. They make you feel welcomed and they genuially care. They are like a family.

I’m really excited about this next chapter in my life. I feel like I am finally breaking some bad habits and am just breaking the “cycle”. I feel like I’ve jumped off of the “hamster wheel” and am really diving into life! I keep envisioning what I want and I continue to not give up on it. My thoughts and actions are creating shifts and it is making a difference!

Although I am getting better I still get afraid before work. I am really hard on myself and I put so much pressure on my nights. However, I think it is actually making me better. Because I work at it and I do overanalyze it, often times, it turns out better than expected. I know I will get better the more time and effort I spend on DJ’ing. I just have to be patient and understand that I am right where I am supposed to be right now. I’ve fought for this. I’ve earned this!

I try to tell people all of the time that it is never to late to go for something that you want. I try and tell some people, including a former DJ that I know, that it is never to late to get back into something you love, even just as a hobby. Life is short. We have to do what is best for “us”! We have to fight for our dreams because often times one dream leads to another! We are never supposed to be stagnant. We just have to remember how to keep moving. Being too still, too idle can be the problem. However there is peace in “stillness“, if one is meant for it. Most of us however, I feel, are meat to move.

So what are “you”, waiting for? Move!

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