Motivational/Lifestyle/Blog

The guy you blew off was probably more than you expected

Ladies have you ever met a guy that seemed to come out of nowhere?  Did you ever find yourself working or going about your day and all of a sudden some guy shows up and crosses your path?  You might say, “yeah it happens all the time”, guys approach women, its just how it goes.  But what if this guy was different?  What if this guy was not what you were expecting?  What if the guy you thought was just like any other, was more than you bargained for?  If you had a few dates worth of knowledge about this guy before you even met him, would you ever let him slip through your fingers?  What if this guy trys to fight for you and your time?  Would you take it for granted?

If you are an attractive woman you probably get to sit and wait.  You choose who you want to give your time to.  After all you are a busy woman.  You work, you keep up on yourself, you have obligations, your time is already well spent.  Not just any guy is going to get your attention.  He has to get it right the first time because one moment is all he has, right?  A man doesn’t just have to approach “you”, he has to do it with confidence and assurance as if you already are going to say yes.  So are you going to say yes?

The answer most of the time, is probably no.  Surly you are not evil!  You let guys down nicely and you know they mean well.  Guys are going to approach a beautiful woman like yourself.  They are just playing their role in the game.  If anything you might have pity for them.  Again you are woman so feeling and nurturing certainly are in your realm to some extent?  I mean for God sakes you aren’t a monster!

So again, what if this one guy is different?  I mean surely he approaches you, he must have some self esteem.  He manages to hold a conversation without mumbling or stuttering.  Even if he is shaking inside, because just by looking at you he sees you are exactly his type, he appears calm.  He is courageous enough to make small talk and ask for your time or your number.  Say you say yes, perhaps just to be polite, and well, you feel sorry for the guy maybe.   You are hoping he’ll give up and get the hint soon enough.

So again what if he is different?  Say he reaches out to you and you talk here and there.  You don’t give him much but he gives in return a lot anyways.  He doesn’t have to but he chooses to.  He chose you and is trying his best.  He sees something in you and his attraction although physical, is backed by real feeling and emotion.  This guy actually cares about you and although tempted by your beauty and your sex appeal, is willing to reserve every temptation and instict inside just out of respect for “you.”  To you he might just be willing to give you everything he can.  He might be willing to sacrifice all, just to see you smile.

So why would a man do that?  I mean its kind of pathetic right?  A man goes out of his way to talk to a woman, seems nervous, and even after you sort of “blow him off” he keeps trying.  Why?  He doesn’t get the hint, you maybe get upset or a least annoyed and all you can think of is, “wow, why are men such creeps?”  “Why can’t they get the hint?”  “I mean this dude doesn’t get it, and its actually kind of sad.”  But is it?

What you might fail to realize because you are a little “caught up”, is that some men actually “like you!”.  I know weird right?  I mean how can a guy know what he wants, make a move, and pursue?  How can a guy pick a woman and if the attraction is strong enough, commit and try to make a relationship out of it?  The truth is true “men”, know what they want, and more than that, have way more to offer than you even realize.  Yeah this is where it’s going to hurt your pride and maybe make you feel like kind of a bitch, but thats okay.  Don’t beat yourself up remember you “mean well”.  So who is he really?

The guy you think you know actually has a good mother.  They are pretty close and they communicate well.  The father in the picture is a good man himself and has been there for the kid.  The guy you think you know is actually pretty solid.  He knows who he is and knows his own worth.  He knows what he wants because he has remained true to himself.  Things are a little more black and white in his life so he has been patient and has filtered through relationships.  His circle is small, and the company he keeps is genuine.  He doesn’t need anyone so he doesn’t have many that are close to him.  He is a guy who isn’t willing to lose himself in order to please others.  The older he gets the stronger he becomes.

So whats the point here?  The point is that the guy you probably need to love is probably already gone.  The guy you need to make time for, is someone you didn’t even have five minutes for.  That guy that seemed alright and liked you was blown off because he just didn’t do things right.  He was too eager, too communicative.  He was too straight forward and too excited.  “He liked me too much.”  “He acted like I was the only woman in the world.”  “Yeah yeah I wasn’t falling for that bullshit.”  “I knew what he wanted all along.”  “He was just like every other guy.”

But was he?

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